wat i'd learned

In any relationship (between spouses, between parents and children, between siblings, between relatives, between friends, between bosses and employees, between one another, etc) it is human to blame the other person for causing the misunderstanding or hurt. We have learnt from very young to point the fault away from us. We are so incredibly trained to notice what’s wrong in any given relationship. And this only makes the matter worse.

Thus, if we still want to maintain a talking and growing relationship, we have to find some guidelines to help us cure our tendencies to blame.
        We know that what Mother Teresa has said is true for any relationship:
        “We know that if we really want to love we must learn how to forgive. (“A Gift for God”, 42)

Thus, in any conflicting relationship, our anger and resentment must ultimately give way to grief and sadness. This means we are saying, “I lost,” because that is the truth. We may have lost a battle for him to change, or to make him see things our way, or to get him to understand just how wrong he was. We have to stop fighting battles that are not worth winning, or not possible to win. That is what God does every day. He lets go and feels sad about how we choose to conduct our lives. When God forgives, He chooses what we human beings would term “lost.” How so? Because soon after we would repeat the same sins and He still forgives us when we say, “I am sorry.” But God does not consider it a lost. Why? Because He loves us so much that He wants our relationship with Him to continue growing in love.

And when God forgives He does not keep count. He does not keep a record of our sins. He chooses not to remember our sins. He lets us start afresh. God says, “I will forgive their sins and will no longer remember their wrongs.” (Hebrews 8:12 TEV) So He forgives us endlessly.

Avoid these blaming in a dating relationship, or it'll just spoil your relationship ...
        “Why do you always. . .”
        “Why don’t you ever ...”
        “I can’t believe you’ve done it again.”
        “I don’t deserve this kind of treatment.”
        “This is your fault.”
        “Who do you think you are?”
        “You’re so. . .”
        “After all I’ve done for you. . .”

Very useful as  i learned alot from it...thx God